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Faith, Marriage
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March 27, 2014

4 Ways To Combat Comparison in Marriage

“So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.’ Genesis 1:27

God created you in His image. Reflect on that statement for a moment. You were created in the image and likeness of God. What a mind blowing thought; being made in the image of God. You were not made by accident. In Psalm 139: 13, it says that He knit you together in your mother’s womb. The creator of the universe divinely pieced you together with a meaning, a worth, a purpose. You are fearfully and wonderfully made. Do you feel the weight of this knowledge?

 

My prayer is that you would believe this with all of your heart. The world is constantly telling you lies that entrap you. You aren’t as pretty as her, you aren’t as successful, your marriage isn’t as good, you aren’t worthy. As the world seeks to tell you that you are not good enough, that you can’t accomplish certain things, God is whispering in your ear to remember who you are and whose you are.
 
You are beautiful. You are loved. You are gifted. You have important things to do in this life. You matter. Your marriage matters.
 
We know these truths with all of our heart, but what do we do when comparison sets in and we feel our marriage isn’t good enough? What do we do when feel jealousy seeping into our marriage because it looks different than our friends?

 

 1. Remember no one is perfect: In public, you are seeing the best. In public, you don’t see the deep secrets in a marriage, the struggles – you only see the outside. Remember this and take heart. No one has a perfect marriage, everyone is struggling with something.
 
2. Pray: Pray against this lie that is entrapping your mind and attention. Comparison steals your joy and is just a plain lie from satan. I firmly believe in the power of prayer and asking God to guard your heart and mind from these thoughts. Ask him to teach you how to combat these thougths and walk in His peace and truth.

 

3. Focus on your marriage: This might seem obvious but seriously take practical steps to focus on your spouse and strengthening your marriage. Here are 10 practical ways to strengthen your marriage. If you are focused on your marriage, it will be much harder to obsess over someone else’s.

 

4. See your spouse as a gift: Yep, that’s right – see him as a gift. I never thought of this until the other day when I was reading my devotional (& when I told Kevin this, he may have laughed at me), but I am serious. God picked out your spouse for you. He gave them to you as a gift. Are you receiving this gift from God with thankfulness and joy or are you rejecting your gift and telling God that it is not good enough? Are you asking God to change your spouse for selfish reasons, or are you trusting that God is molding your spouse into exactly who He intends them to be? Your attitude towards your spouse reflects how you see them as a gift. Your marriage is a gift and blessing from God, don’t think of this lightly. You are a team. Build each other up and care for each other.
 
I will say it again. Remember who you are and whose you are. You matter. Your marriage matters. Stop comparing your marriage to others and receive your full gift from God.

 

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2 Comments
  • Marquis Clarke
    March 27, 2014

    Thank you SO much for sharing this today!
    I am guilty of doing this SO often and I have to catch myself and remind myself that no marriage is the same and no marriage is perfect. It’s totally true what you said….in public, every marriage looks perfect, because you don’t see what’s really going on.
    Definitely a great reminder to pray. Not only when you’re in that moment of comparison, but other times as well….maybe when you’re thinking about your spouse!

    Reply
  • Marquis Clarke
    March 27, 2014

    This is soo awesome!!! It is so easy to compare marriages. Thank you so much!!

    Reply

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Hi, I’m Marquis Clarke

Hi, I’m Marquis Clarke

I'm a modern mom of two, who strives to encourage women throughout marriage and motherhood. I embrace life as it comes with kid meltdowns, family dance parties, and snacks galore. I believe that laughter is the best medicine, simplicity is perfection, and that life is breathtakingly beautiful.

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