Becoming a mom for the first time is an unforgettable feeling. I remember so vividly seeing “pregnant” flash across the screen. I was instantly in love, instantly terrified, instantly worried and instantly so filled with joy. There are so many different emotions that come with becoming a mom and honestly, there are so many things no one tells you about becoming a mom. From how to take care of yourself postpartum, to how to navigate parenthood, to how to pick a pediatrician. There are so many questions that come to mind and I am so excited to announce that the last Tuesday of each Month, I will be helping host “Mom Talk Tuesday” where REAL moms talk about REAL mom stuff. Nothing is off limits and we are so excited to learn and grow with each other on this crazy ride called parenting. This is the first week and I am focusing on 7 Things No One Tells You about Becoming A Mom:
1. The Messes
Kids are messy. I don’t know how I missed this memo to the degree I did. Before we even left the hospital, Brooke had successfully ruined two of her outfits and one of mine. Babies spit up like crazy and gosh, the poop. No one tells you that you will be hands deep in pee and poop for years. Don’t even get me started on potty training! Did I mention meal time is extra messy too? Oh, and toys will enter ever crevice of your house?
I am easily Type A. I love organization. I love a plan. I love order. I love efficiency. Well, who knew that little humans are the least efficient people on the planet!? Kids, especially multiple kids, bring chaos. I’m not saying its always a bad chaos though. I firmly believe in embracing the chaos of life and enjoying every single crazy second. But, its crazy. Sometimes, we are late because Brooke has messed up her hair for the 5th time. Or, sometimes we are late because Little Kevin decides to empty out a cabinet. You never know what you are going to get on a given day. Being a mom is a surprise every day. Most days don’t go as planned and you have to learn how to go with the flow.
3. The Worry
The worry comes so easy. From the second I found out I was pregnant, I was worried about being at a theme park the week before riding roller coasters and everything I was eating. The worry comes with parenting. You love those little babes so much you can’t stand it, so you worry. They get a fever, you worry. They sleep different, you worry. You wrack your brain to be the best for them.
Friendships change. Once you are a mom, your world changes. You might get a text from a friend in the middle of a blowout then forget to text back for an hour. You might be too exhausted to go to girls night. Things change, but your true friends get it – even if they don’t have kids. They understand you – they love you. And, they would climb any mountain for your kids. Hold on to friends like that. I know my best friend who didn’t have kids yet was the first person I would trust with my children. She loves my kids like her own. Those friendships are worth exhaustion. Worth every effort. Hold them tight and when it comes time, love their littles exactly the same way.
I was having coffee with a friend that just had a new baby and as we were talking, the conversation of marriage and kids came up. “Why does no one tell you about the effect kids have on your marriage?” she exclaimed, “I know!”. It really is interesting. People urge you to read books on pregnancy, giving birth, baby products, nursing, and more, but no one informs you about nurturing your marriage along the way. Having a baby is a huge life change and your spouse needs nurturing too! While we are a big “work in progress” on managing our marriage and kids, I can share my top 10 Tips For A Healthy Marriage After Kids.
6. The Joy
Oh, the joy. When your baby hugs you back for the first time… When they give you a kiss… When they say I love you Mama… When they say, “your my best friend”… With each belly laugh, with each smile, they make your whole world. They make life so incredible. They bring so much joy. So much love. Life will never be the same.
7. The Community
When you become a mom, no one really talks about the community of support you will have. While I firmly believe that you are not a perfect parent, but the perfect parent for your child – I also believe in seeking help from other moms along the way. There are times in parenting when you need opinions, you need ideas, you need to learn and I am so excited to announce that the last Tuesday of each month, I will be participating in “Mom Talk Tuesday”. Each of the hosts and guest hosts will share about a topic related to motherhood or parenting in hopes to help you along the way.
I cannot tell you how excited I am about this because every child is different. I remember walking through potty training with Brooke and reading article after article of different methods. Seeing that different things worked for different moms, not only gave me hope that we wouldn’t just give up all together, but also gave me IDEAS to try for ourself.
So, here we go! Below are the other hosts that will be sharing each month and I can’t wait to get started on our first topic next month! Go check them out and give them a follow.
Maggie Kern: www.polishedclosets.com @polishedclosets
ME: Marquis Clarke: www.simplyclarke.com @marquis_clarke
Aubrey Ballard: www.thedandyliar.com @thedandyliar
Caroline Hulse: www.carolinehulse.com @caroline.hulse